How a tin of beans helps me to speak to big audiences

Ahh, public speaking.

Some fear it, most hate it, but me? I can’t get enough of it. Being a Young Ambassador for The Prince’s Trust has given me plenty of opportunities to give speeches (not to mention sample some rather excellent food) and I take every chance I’m offered.

But a question I get asked a lot is: “How do you manage to speak to audiences that big? Don’t you get nervous?”

Of course I do. Anyone was close enough to me when I was speaking at the HR Distinction awards would have seen my hand shaking a scary amount.

But the ability to speak isn’t about not having those nerves, it’s the ability to control them and still deliver the message you want to send. In fact, the presence of nerves comforts me. Anyone who isn’t nervous before public speaking is either a superhuman or, more likely, somewhat arrogant of their ability.

So, what is the best way to cope? Some would tell you to imagine the audience naked.

No thank you.

When I’m about to go on stage and give a speech, the first thing I do is sit up very straight and pretend I’m someone extremely powerful. This gives me the illusion of power and therefore a bit of control over how I’m feeling. That sounds stupid but it really works for me so I don’t mind too much.

And then, I remember my audience is just like a tin of beans.

I don’t picture them all dressed as cans of Heinz*, that would be ridiculous and would put anyone off. No, I just look at the audience and realise that I can’t actually see any facial details. They’re all just a mesh of unidentifiable beings all gathered closely. They’re all beans in a can, that’s it.

Now, what is terrifying about talking to a tin of beans? Unless you’re an outsider watching someone actually talking to a tin of tomatoey beany goodness of course. That'd freak me out no end.

It works for me. It makes me more comfortable in front of a crowd. Maybe I’m just a bit crazy but why not give it a go yourself next time you speak?

Remember:

Audience = tin of beans

I’d be fascinated to hear how other people manage with public speaking. Do you have a unique (and slightly less crackpot than mine, I imagine) way of preparing for a speech? Let me know in the comments J

*Other, similarly excellent, brands of beans are available

Why we're not the 'lost' generation

I’ve seen a few articles floating about over the past year or so referring to my age group and those a little younger as the ‘lost generation.’

Ahem.

Now, obviously I respect the opinions of others, what with me being a half decent human being with a fairly accurate moral compass.

However, the term ‘lost generation’ causes a teeny-weeny crack to appear in my usual composed, respectful and dignified self. I’ve largely kept quiet and got on with what I do but now I feel I should air my frustrations.

Young people, such as myself (just about), make mistakes. We do that. It’s part of being young. Our parents probably made similar mistakes at our age. As did our grandparents. Of course, the situation is different these days and some of my peers’ actions have been less than optimal in terms of decision making.

But before giving us up as a ‘lost’ cause, let’s have a quick scan over some facts:

Our generation have inherited a world of austerity, unemployment and limited opportunity. A world where the rich get richer and the poor, let’s be blunt, kind of get trampled into the dirt.

Despite how the media and our government would portray us, we’re actually (mostly) quite a good bunch of people. Sure, there are some cretinous individuals (-cough- Justin Bieber -cough-), but this is the same as any other generation. Overall, we’re not so bad. Our mistakes are more intensely scrutinised because news (and rumour and prejudice, it is worth pointing out) is so easily visible as a result of the growth of social media.

Let’s take a look at the riots a couple of years ago. I’m not condoning the actions of those involved. They further damaged an already tarnished reputation of young people with mindless acts of greed and criminality that will be remembered for years to come.

But why did it happen?

I saw quotes from people involved mentioning that they were bored angry and frustrated.

We are not the ‘lost generation.’ We are the frustrated generation.

We’re frustrated that, through no fault of our own, we’re forced to struggle much harder than our parents to make something of ourselves and to succeed.

We’re frustrated because our politicians claim to want to help us, then lie to us to gain our vote in unjustifiable attempts to satisfy their lust for power.

But most of all, we’re frustrated that those same politicians have given up on us and labelled us as “lost,” while simultaneously claiming expenses for holiday homes in countries most from my background will never get the opportunity to visit to broaden their horizons.

Why should we, as young people, tolerate such poor and inaccurate prejudice?

How is slapping the ‘lost’ label on us going to benefit us and encourage us to be more than we’re expected to be in this ever toughening world?

Why are our voices not being heard as much as they could be? Why is it right for it to be assumed that because we’re young, we don’t know what we’re talking about?

Of course, it’s not all doom and gloom. Fantastic organisations, such as The Prince’s Trust, do amazing things for young people who need it.

But it’s not enough.

We are the future of this world. We are the people who will lead this country in whatever industry we find ourselves in. It’s time that those in positions of power, whether political power or in the media, have more faith in us and recognise that we are not lost and never will be. It’s time they recognise that we won’t ever accept such unjustified judgement from those who only try and help us if there’s a television crew and journalists there.

Most  of all, it’s time it was recognised that we deserve a whole lot more respect than is given.

From Unemployed to Ambassador – How the Prince’s Trust helped me.

The Prince’s Trust does not save lives. It doesn’t change them either.

It gives young people the power to change their own lives and gives them skills they will use for years to come.

This, among many reasons, is why I feel so passionate about the Trust.

When I joined the Team Programme in June 2013, my confidence and prospects were at an all time low. Without going into already covered territory, I was in a pretty bad place and needed a kick up the backside.

I agreed, after an annoying (yet necessary as it turned out) amount of pressure from my JobCentre adviser, to attend the open event and see what the fuss was about. The idea of spending twelve weeks in a room with people I didn't know was an image of hell for my introverted self.

My life changed after the first day.

I immediately opened myself up to possibilities and opportunities with the intention of experiencing everything I possibly could from those 3 months. I found myself doing things I never would have considered – like getting in a canoe despite having a gripping fear of drowning.

I didn't finish the programme and immediately go into work, as some young people assume will happen. I gave everything to that course but the opportunity for work just wasn't there. However, I knew full well that the skill set the course gave me would lead, however long it took, to better and more fulfilling job prospects. This, it has done – I am now a proud social media apprentice for West Midlands Fire Service, a fantastic job and the start of what will hopefully be a successful career.

Just over a year on, I am privileged to say that I am a Young Ambassador for the Trust, and am due to attend my first event in early October. What has been given to me in terms of confidence, skills and positivity is a debt that can’t be repaid with any number of promotional events that I speak at.

The summer of intake of Young Ambassadors for the Midlands

What I hope is that I can encourage young people to get involved with what is, in fact, a fantastic and essential charity in this country. If every young person was able to get participate in the huge range of courses offered, the future of this country would look very bright indeed.

Young people are the future of this country. Their well being, their prospects, and their attitude are essential to how we progress as a nation. Whatever our age or background, we all have a responsibility to give something to the people who will determine how we live our lives in the future. This is something The Prince’s Trust have set about doing with fantastic schemes and programmes that will, and I repeat with certainty, WILL give young people the skills to change their lives.

Why you should never give up...

From 11^th March 2013, my life came crashing behind my ears.

Before then, I had everything I had ever dreamed of. I was living happily with my girlfriend of the time, we had a beautiful cat, my job prospects were looking good, my confidence was higher than it had ever been. On top of this, I was doing what I love (singing and playing poker) on a regular basis and enjoying some success.

On 10^th March, I was playing a poker tournament in Birmingham. It was the regional final of a league that I had qualified for. I came third of about 200, and I was over the moon. I couldn’t wait to get back and treat my girlfriend, as I had wanted to do for a while but had a lack of money.

The next day, she ended the relationship and kicked me out of our flat. This was swiftly followed by multiple job rejections, being unable to live at my mum’s place, or my sister’s.

I ended up at the Chace Centre in Coventry, which, if you didn’t know, is worse than prison. I was sinking deeper and deeper into depression. I was then viciously attacked and was hospitalised with fractured ribs and a punctured lung.

A few weeks later, I was diagnosed with a tumour in my stomach. I admit, I was close to giving up at this point. I sat in my small, dingy room feeling sorry for myself, torturing myself with thoughts about what I wanted life to be like.

I started an intense course of treatment for the tumour, which made me feel constantly fatigued and ill, and also had a severe impact on my already fragile mental health. I was referred to the Coventry Foyer, another supported housing establishment, where I was offered fantastic support.

Why am I telling you this?

Well, because almost a year ago, I was drained of my positivity. There was no light at the end of the tunnel for me, and I didn’t believe that anything would get better.

The Prince’s Trust Team Programme was the turning point for me. For those who don’t know, Team is a 12 week course aimed at developing the employment and personal skills of young people. It was the best thing that has ever happened to me, and it had a real impact on my life. It offered motivation that I had been lacking for months, and gave me hope that I could get back to happiness.

On 6^th September 2013, I was given the news that my tumour had cleared. This was incredible news – it was remarkably quick, I had been expecting a much longer struggle than the one I faced. This was a catalyst for me, and I became determined to live life to the maximum. However, issues with my long-gone ex girlfriend still held me back, and I let her keep me down, much to the frustration of my new friends.

If I fast forward to where I am today – I’ve started a fantastic and exciting Apprenticeship with the Juice Academy, I’m due to move into my new place, I’m finally happy to be single, and I’ve rediscovered the happy, lively me that was brought out during the Team Programme.

The reason for this is my stubborn refusal to give in on life. I was tempted, many times to do so. But it is ingrained upon my mind to keep on going. What else could I do? I knew I had abilities, strengths that not everyone necessarily had. I was wasting them, and I knew it. I have fought, and struggled throughout all this adversity, without really knowing why I was bothering.

Now I know why I kept going. I simply had to. I was placed on this earth, to have a story and share it. I have been through more in the last year than a lot of people will go through in 10 years. I came through it, and now I’m in a better position than ever.

I have learned so many lessons from it. I won’t go for the cliché “every cloud has a silver lining.” But I will tell you that throughout any hard time you may go through, you can come through it. If problems are clouds, then remember that clouds dissipate.

My plea to you is never to give up. Whether this be on your dreams, or even on the crossword in the paper – keep going and you’ll get there. My sheer determination got me through an uncountable amount of pain and suffering. Be determined. If you want to get through it, you will.

Forget what anyone tells you, even if they’re trying to be positive and tell you “everything will be ok.” Focus on yourself, on breeding your own positive attitude and on facing your problems face on. Most importantly of all: know that you are amazing. You were built to survive, and you can survive if you believe it.

I overcame a messy break up, homelessness, being attacked, life threatening illness, unemployment and depression. Now I'm smiling a broader smile than I ever have. I'm a stronger person, and for that reason, I feel no bitterness and everything I've been subjected to.

What inspires you to keep going during your hardest times? Let me know in the comments section below.